I'm pretty sure 'normal' families don't have conversations like this.
Wolf: Women are malicious. Men will just kill you, but women want to watch you suffer...preferably for years.
Me: Name one thing I've ever deliberately done to cause you pain.
Me: MARRYING you does NOT count!
(Bedtime for Tazzie)
Taz: Uh oh
Taz: I stink
Taz: I farted. I can't sleep, its stinky *starts flapping his blankets*
Me: *just about gagging* Too bad, you made it, you sleep in it.
Five minutes later:
Taz: Woof! Woof! I'm a dog!
Me: ok, night puppy...*puts glass of water on his headboard*
Taz: Woof! Woof! Puppies need a bowl, not a cup! Woof! Woof!
Me: You can use the cup.
Taz: Woof! I don't gots thumbs! Puppies can't hold cups! Need a bowl! Woof!
Me: Then when you get thirsty, you'll have to change back into a boy. G'night!
Taz: *starts crawling out of his room, 'woofing' and wiggling his butt.
Me: Puppies don't have thumbs, so they can't play xbox tomorrow. And little boys that get out of bed can't play either.
Taz: *runs back into his room*
Honestly, this can't be normal. Can it? For the record, Taz has been an issue to get to bed lately. I don't doubt that he saved his gas emissions all day just to try and use gas warfare as a delay bedtime technique. And no thumbs? Ok, so I've told the cat that since he didn't have thumbs he didn't get his choice of seats in the livingroom, but oy!