Thursday, July 3, 2008

Dancing Nekkid

Ok, so its time to move on to more personal in my lil heathens. I'm going to start with 'Taz'. You'll hear about him a lot. Taz is 3 years old, and, dare I say, gorgeous. Dirty blonde hair, stunning blue eyes, and eyelashes that not only are stupidly long and thick, but freaking curl. And before anyone asks, no, neither of my daughters are that blessed. God has a cruel sense of ha ha.

ANYWAYS...about Tazzie boy.

The child is a never ending whirling activity centre. And, because I must have done something really bad in my past life, like club baskets of newborn puppies, he's as smart as he is busy.

Trust me, from a mother's perspective, that's a bad baaaaaad combo. From a homeschooling mother's perspective, that's enough to cause me to daydream of kindergarten, and/or strong meds. For me, not him. Essentially, if I don't keep this child busy when concious, he'll find something to do. And, being bright, its nothing within the boringly normal antics of the average 3 year old. Nope, course not.

For starters, the lil heathen uses the puter better than Wolf. Seriously. And has taught himself to READ well enough to know which is his list of favourites, and which site is which. (I did mention that he's 3, right? Turned 3 in Feb?)

Ok, so that's part of the background.

The other part is...Taz likes being nekkid. I mean...he LIKES being nekkid. Child has no modesty, no shame, no thermostat, cause he's just as happy being nekkid in Dec as in June. Outside. Although, he does come in faster in Dec.

So, the other week, he was in the wading pool, and came in. I stripped off his wet togs, and went to get him some dry clothes from the basement. (Yes, our laundry room is down there. The 1 armed thing means there's a perfectly good excuse to live out of laundry baskets now.) As I was coming back up the stairs, I heard, "I am NEKKID! I'm NEKKID NEKKID NEKKID, singing the NEKKID SOOOOOOONG!" over and over.

I discover Taz, out on the back steps, nekkid, shaking his hips and butt all over the top step, bellowing the 'Nekkid Song' at top volume.

And of course my neighbour was in her yard.

Then there was the other night. Taz was once again in his natural state, standing in front of the fan, yelling the 'Nekkid Song' into it. (He had just discovered how weird your voice sounds when you yell into the fan). I watched him dance like he was channelling Elvis, and then looked at Wolf. See, I don't know about all the other SAHM out there, but my husband doesn't always seem to quite believe the things that happen in my day. While he laughed about Taz dancing for the neighbours, there was a sense that I must have dramatized things a bit. Watching his son do some pretzel hips, he commented, " least we know how he'll pay for college."

Sunday, June 29, 2008

But He LOVES You

Seems like everywhere I turn lately, divorce and splitting up is running rampant. I guess spring isn't just a wedding season, but a divorce season too.

Cheating is still probably one of the biggest reasons for splitting up that I hear of. And it never ceases to just flat out astound me the double standard that is still alive and well when it comes to sex, marriage and infidelity.

If a woman cheats, she's a whore, a slut. She's scum, a vile betrayer of the sanctity of her marriage.

If a man cheats..."It was just sex, I LOVE you!" Seriously, I heard that one personally, I've had friends hear it, and recently, one woman I know had her MOTHER tell her, "it was just sex, he loves you!" How in the name of hell does that one work? There seems to be the mindset that a man is a slave to his dick, compeltely incapable of controlling those manly urges, and its up to the women to forgive the poor helpless male his failings. Its just lust, dear.

Bullshit, says I. Bullshit. Can you imagine if a wife were to say the same thing? "He was just really well hung dear. But I LOVE you!" Yeah. Why don't I see that one going over at all? So why would a guy think that it should be a path to forgiveness? Why do so many men vow that they would kill (or beat the living snot out of) any man they found with their wife...yet figure that sorry and some flowers or maybe a diamond should result in automatic forgiveness? Why is it that still, in 2008, a man screwing around isn't viewed as negatively as a woman doing the same?

And while I'm at it..."It didn't mean anything, I was drunk, it wasn't my fault" is another bullshit line. Being drunk doesn't get you off the hook if you run someone over, beat someone why would it be a reasonable excuse in screwing around? I mean, seriously...has that EVER worked? Has any spouse ever looked at the cheater and said, "Oh, Dear...since you were drunk, its totally ok. Alls forgiven!" Hell no. If anything, it makes it worse, because of the lame attempt to escape any and all responsibility for their actions.

Responsibility is another thing. I've always personally wanted to turn a flame thrower on those that actually attempt to blame their spouse for their wandering gonads. "Well...if you hadn't gained weight...had kept the house clean...wore something other than sweat pants...wore makeup...I wouldn't have HAD to cheat." Again, utter bullshit. Unless you feed your husband Viagra, tie him to the bed, and impale another woman on his willy, the responsibility for cheating lies completely, utterly and totally on the cheater. If you're unhappy with your marriage, you have choices. Either work to fix it, or get out. Cheating is never the answer or the solution. Its a complete betrayal of trust, valuing your naughty bits over your family and marriage.