Sunday, December 28, 2008

Being Led?

Ok, to state the obvious, I survived Christmas. Actually, it turned out to be the best Christmas I've had yet during my marriage. Pretty sweet.

On to today/tonight's topic:

Ever have things come into play, fall into place that are subtle, yet totally unexpected and you can't help but wonder if God/Higher Power is giving you a swift kick in the hiney and telling you, "That's the way to go, hoss your freight already!" but the logical part of your brain tells you to quit being a tool, you're so eager/desperate for something to come along to make sense and give you direction that you might find mystical meaning in a snowbank?

How do you know which it is? Or do you just go on faith?

I've been praying since it became apparent that this CRPS crap wasn't going to just go away that I'd find direction, something that would somehow make sense, give me that 'aha!' moment. I dunno if this would make any sense to anyone else, but when the shit's hit the fan in my life, I've been able to look back and go, 'aha! If a hadn't happened, then I wouldn't have had b...' and it makes a weird sort of sense, that its all linked somehow, like a set of dominoes or a giant puzzle or tapestry...from every challenge, there's been a positive arise somehow. I've been looking for the positive in this stupid stupid STUPID work incident and CRPS, and coming up pretty empty...and then some info came to me which made a light go on and make me wonder...

So, am I alone in my weirdness of seeing positives directly arise from perceived negatives, or is it something that others have experienced?

And how do you tell if its God kicking your booty in a direction, or just your own hopeful desperation seeing meaning in nothing?

5 comments:

smnthpt said...

If God wants you to be somewhere doing something he will close all other doors so that eventually you'll get the idea that this is the direction you are supposed to take. Once you finally get it... things fall into place (not always a speedy process). I still think you were born to write. What do you feel you are meant to do from here? What does your gut tell you? BTW... Merry Christmas. I'm really glad to hear you had a good one.

Unknown said...

Actually, its about writing *blush* Something has come up that somehow I missed before, and it came around again, with a harder nudge.

We'll see what happens...lol!

Iva said...

Remember in our lives, we see the tiny parts. It's only God who sees the bigger picture. The bigger picture is actually a lot of smaller pictures.

I can't wait until you reveal more :)

erieblog said...

About 8 years ago CRPS laid me low after a broken leg. It took a couple of years to realize life as I'd known it had changed. The list of losts was long - professional career, independence, active sports, yada yada yada. I was the prototype doctor/lawyer/indian chief. My sister said it was the only way God could slow me down. Seems harsh.

It did teach me humility. It also taught me to accept care and caring from friends and strangers alike.

Recently I've improved (Medtronic pump plus Pilates) and I find myself casting about for some way to begin giving back. I'd better make sure that's ok with God eh?

Best wishes with your own path.

Jane! said...

I believe that if you look for the positive, you will find it. But then maybe God has to kick you in the butt to make you look for the positive...

That ceramic Santa came from my husbands mom - who did ceramics years ago. She just gave it to him this summer, tho.