I'm An Idiot.

I'm sitting here crying. No, my family is all well, thanks. No, I'm not hurt (anymore than usual) or damaged more than normal.

I had the first results come in from my short story contests that I'd entered. It was from the story that I was most sure of, most proud of, was so certain was the BEST work that I'd done.

Nada. Zip. Zilch. Zero.

So, I sit here, sobbing like a spoiled child whose just been told she can't have the chocolate treat she wants.

I know, I KNOW intellectually what a crapshoot these contests are, that what one editor considers a steaming pile of dung another considers the literary boon to mankind. I know that.

I also know that literary accomplishment aside, placing in the contest would have meant some badly needed funds into the Stepford home.

So I'm sitting here crying.

I'll get my spoiled rump off to bed shortly. Assuming I quit sucking my thumb long enough, of course.

Goals Met!

Some good news from me for a change!

I met my writing goals for this month!

As of last night, I submitted to three short story contests!

The first story I'm ok with. Too much editing drove me a bit whacky, and just lost my interest in the story. Its not a bad story, just had to tinker with it too much.

Story #2 I really enjoyed. Its the shortest of the 3, but to attempt to add more would have just taken away from it. Its exactly the length it needed to be.

Story #3 I'm just plain thrilled with. Its a genre that I don't normally write, and not even a genre I read. Normally, I'm a suspense/mystery/horror/thriller/romance fan, so that's what I tend to write. My gf K challenged me to write something completely different, with no 'hook' so to speak. Literary fiction, rather than genre. About people, personalities as the plot.

So I did.

And I have to say, without false bragging, it turned out amazingly well. And for me to think something is GOOD that I accomplished...well, that should give you an idea as to just how pleased I am with it.

I'm planning on turning it into a full length novel, but it requires a ton o'research first.

Sooooooooo, I have other writing to attend to, as pain permits. Somedays I just can't...so I revel in the days I can.

I won't have any idea as to if I've even made the short list for any of the 3 for months. Indeed, one of them only the winner and runners up are contacted...sometime in JUNE. I kid you not.

Thank heavens I've got enough on the go not to be able to obsess about it. Much, anyways.

Two more deadlines next month for writing contests, and I *still* want to submit some articles to magazines.

Here's hoping for some positive news soon!

First Official Submission And Adversity

Ok, so its official.

I have now entered into a short story contest. Eeep.

Like most other things in my life, Murphy (or whatever name you wanna call it...The Advesary, Satan, Bad Luck) was a copassenger along the way.

My friend and editor, K went with me for moral support (and to fill out the p0stage label) to the post office at Shoppers. Knowing that we'd be going out to eat, I also printed off another story for editing on a whim.

So, everything's signed, sealed, and handed over.

Sitting at the restaraunt, I start looking over the other story...and realize that the first sentance off every page from page 2-14 is MISSING. I'm talking, gonzo. For whatever reason, putting a header into my copy made the top sentance vanish.

UH OH.

I've now submitted for publication an incomplete manuscript that has glaring omissions.

*insert curse words here*

Also, the post office is closed at this point. Naturally.

I call the drug store where the postal outlet is located, and have a mini meltdown, almost in tears, begging the guy to leave a note for the postal clerk to put this aside, I'll be in first thing in the am. Luckily, I opted for Express Post, so I had a receipt, tracking #, etc.

Spent the night up and down like a psychotic yo-yo, praying that they'd allow me to swap it out with the corrected version. Otherwise, not only am I gonna look like a complete donkey that doesn't have the common sense to proof before mailing, but its gonna cost me another $30, btwn the mailing and the money order for the submission fee.

I called my gf J in a panic. Was this a sign that I shouldn't be attempting this, I asked her, or is this someone (see Murphy comment above) screwing with me, trying to prevent me from taking this step. It was her sleepy (time difference, I woke her up) opinion that Satan was screwing with me, and that it was God's guidance that had me discover the error. (If I hadn't printed off the 2nd manuscript, I never would have known. I'd printed the dang thing off I dunno how many times without a problem).

Sooooo, feeling somewhat more hopeful, I trundle in at opening this am. First thing that greets me, as I walk into the store is music over the speakers. Specifically, Wolf and my wedding song. I pray its an omen (good, don't be sarcastic here :P) and head to the postal outlet.

Not only did I get to swap it out, but she voided the envelope and gave me a new one, filled out the mailing info, etc...for free. WOOOO HOOOOO!!!!

So, at least if I don't succeed at *this* particular contest, I know that I was given help and guidance to at least ensure that it got there properly!